BMMI Episode 029: Familiar Faces

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This week’s episode exposes the naked face behind mask-centric films. Elijah Wood stars as a bored jokester armed only with a 3D printer and a high resolution scan of his face. And what else can you do but print a bunch of masks of your face and stick them on flies to confuse people. Wood’s pranks escalate to more daring feats in a world just realizing the immense, terrible power behind a really realistic mask. They’re not just for making pigs into the next James Dean, hypnotizing chickens, or scaring yourself when you forget you put one on your dog. Maybe all those masked supervillains were on to something.

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BMMI Episode 028: Love After Life

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This week’s movie is a rom-com but with vampires! Starring Christoph Waltz as the cool guy Dracula and Brendan Fraser as a goth wannabe vampire. The twist? These two lovers think the other one is fakin’ and that’s a dealbreaker! This week we go over all them weird twisty, topsy turvy rom-coms. Kelsey and Andrew talk about partially misremembered director’s cuts of Kate and Leopold–did you know she dates her great-great-grandson? But only in the director’s true vision.

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Essential Podquest Inventory: Pet Rocks!

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Ah yes, just what every adventurer needs on their perilous journey: a pet rock! These magical companions were first introduced to the party in part 2 of chapter one, Baenum Bandits upon entering Inna’s Shop.

Amongst souvenirs, jewellery, and finery, Inna sells enchanted rocks, albeit at a steep price. Each rock has a smiley face painted on, and remains inert until it has received food and some petting. Once awake, it’s likely to want a name to go by as well.

The local enchanter imbued each one with a random spell or ability that the rock will wish to use at their new friend’s request. Since the rocks themselves are souvenirs in a tourist boutique, it’s unlikely that any will have a powerful or dangerous enchantment (let alone relevant to the task at hand). Of course, that never stops Gnoman, Giacabo, or Digby from getting creative.

How long do rocks remain sentient? What kinds of magic do they command? Do any of them freak out upon gaining consciousness for the first time? Can you trust them as far as you can throw them? Why so many questions about rocks?! All these questions and more will be addressed as we continue the story of Podquest: No Strangers to Adventure!

BMMI Episode 027: The Most Dangerous Vacation

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This movie’s got a private island! A fresh oyster bar! And only one way to return home. That’s right, it’s a battle royale film! Paul Dano stars as a super smug rich boy that’s convinced he could survive a massive fight to the death. Lured guests are told only one person can leave the island alive, so they better get to killing. But Dano’s weekend plan falls apart when he’s sniffed out quickly by the guests as the man behind the murder game, and becomes the sole target of the hundred other people he’s trapped with him. Can he grovel, sneak, and cheat his way to survival? Will he realize this was just a perverted, roundabout attempt to make some friends before he’s gutted with a butter knife?

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BMMI Guest Ep 02: Twins of the Decade (with Special Guest David Hoh!)

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They’re ten years apart in age, but identical twins: Jamie Bell and Tom Holland are Twins of the Decade! This week’s movie harkens back to the days of pseudo-science, heart-warming comedies such as Twins, Junior, and Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. These two brothers are vying for the same role in the Detective Pikachu movie starring Dad (Danny DeVito), and it’ll take a great escape from Disneyland and a hearty Thanksgiving family dinner for them to sort out the complex emotions that come with one twin being stuck in the womb for ten years and popping out perfect.

This poster was designed by special guest David Hoh himself! If this poster tells you anything, it’s that this film is the next in line as a charming family Disney classic, and Jamie Bell just hates mascots so much.

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BMMI Episode 026: The Pigs

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Does anyone remember the Stephen King autobiography? You know, the one with the evil pigs who whisper scary stories into his sleeping ears and explains his unexplainable fear of fireworks on the 4th of July. Well maybe it’s not a book but we definitely made it into a movie. This week’s poster is doing it’s very best to emulate a classic Stephen King dust jacket much in the vein of Misery or Pet Sematary.

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BMMI Episode 025: Bird’s Eye View

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Road trips are about finding yourself. Communing with nature lets you realize your full potential as a human on this green Earth. Or these may all be ploys of a trickster demon to hitchhike your possessed body to a certain destination, say a place of brimstone and hellfire. The first half of Bird’s Eye View is a legitimately uplifting, inspirational road trip movie about a woman finding herself after her husband just ups and disappears. The second half is the slow creep of realization behind why her husband is missing, and why it’s too late for her to find him. And it starts with a human face, and an owl’s body. If you like Into the Wild and Drag Me to Hell, this will do ya.

This week’s episode was inspired by an image: Continue reading

The Road to Baenum

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This is the route the party takes in On the Road: Fidgety Digits, the fifth episode of our podcast Podquest: No Strangers to Adventure. This post may spoil some things if you haven’t already listened to the first five episodes!

The dotted line follows the main road most traffic takes upon arrival to Rinsland. From Zlys Port, the only safe place to dock on the entire island, the main road takes the smoothest approach over rolling fields to later mountainous terrain to the capital Feudersfall, tucked in near the steep cliffs northwest five to six days travel away.

The party’s carriage ride takes them about a day’s travel from the port to Baenum, the second largest town in the country. Baenum is a town of craftsmen, merchants, and an enchanter that naturally developed as the first major waypoint on a long trip to Feudersfall.

This is a close-up of the general map of Rinsland, that will continue to be detailed with landmarks and populations as the story evolves. Detailed maps of towns will follow as the party explores all the nooks and crannies.

Ivaniri’s Stone

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This is an item introduced in Part One of the prologue of our podcast Podquest: No Strangers to Adventure. This post may spoil minor things if you haven’t already listened to the first episode!

Ivaniri, an ancient elf, has just arrived in Zlys Port with his grandson Johnny. He has this carved stone with him. The blue gemstone is indigenous to Rinsland only. The pattern carved into it is a familiar elven design. There’s nothing particularly unique about this carved pendant; it’s basically like a high-end souvenir to Ivaniri, to remind him of Rinsland, to return to the home he left centuries ago. Ivaniri even offered the stone to the party in exchange for help moving forward on his journey. Why the stone would be fought over is unknown…

The notes on the diagram are written in the Otikiri Elven, an isolated off-shoot of Elven unique to the native Otikiri Elves of Rinsland.

Gnoman, Digby, and Giacabo were quick to help this new acquaintance retrieve his pendant, for which Ivaniri is supremely grateful.